Identity Crisis

This year has been an interesting year due to the worldwide pandemic, more different than the previous. I guess a part was that in this time of isolation we see the world differently. I have seen lots of people talk about health, depression and even identity. It appears the world is questioning what is real. I have met lots of people who have questioned who they personally are and what makes them unique. Unlike previous years people have become more engaged in the Social and Digital Worlds where perfection and illusion are the masters. We are entering in an era where individuality is dying and is dead. I have seen this trend grow over the last few years. I tend to wear some crazy baseball caps and am known as the guy with the hats. There have been many times where people tell me that “I wish I could wear a hat like that.” And when I ask them why they can’t they never give a straight answer. However, the answers that I do get are about socially imposed identity limiting them. It is as if their social media and digital platform hangs over them in such a way that they can’t be different than a standard that they don’t set. The standard is given to them by peers and the pressure and illusion of perfection make it impossible to break free. And that standard has become such an integral part of their life that they themselves no longer have a say in who they are. And this is not because they are not able to or don’t want to but that they “just can’t.” In a way we have become overwhelmed with the standard of a collective identity that has been imposed on everyone to the point that we are no longer free to determine or self-impose our own identity.

In this paper we will be exploring two ways of understanding how a person’s identity is constituted: self-imposed and socially-imposed. In exploring self-imposed identity, we will come to understand a version of our self that is created through willful, free, and individual self-expression. In exploring socially-imposed identity we will examine how our self is created through the interplay of social norms and interactions. Self-imposed identity is driven by our own view of ourselves on an individual level, whereas socially-imposed identity is informed by how we are viewed within the context of a given social order. While both dimensions of self-formation are important in understanding a person’s identity, our claim is that the ever-growing dominance of socially-imposed identity is distorting our sense of self and is killing individuality.

Self-Imposed Identity

Self-imposed Identity is the parts of our identities that generate from within. It is the ideas that we take from our own lives and feed it into the person that we want to be. It is in the mind that has a major impact on who we are. As a person we live life, and we try to understand it through defining the world and our relationship to the world. It is in this process that we start to look at ourselves and say, “Who am I?” Naturally, the answer is simple to start; it begins with I AM… It is this answer that our self-imposed identity is then generated from. It is this limitless and endless answer that becomes who we are. It is this answer that expands and becomes our character. It is this answer that draws out the idea of who we will become. It is in accepting this identity that we generate a true sense of self. And just like the answer is limitless we also have become limitless in our ability to be.

This place of self-identity draws upon our own desires and experiences. It helps us define goals and measures our success. I saw this inspirational quote recently on Facebook; “Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.” – Suzy Kassem. This highlights this idea of self-drawn identity that lies hidden in our mind. It helps us leave the mundane repetition of day to day living and turn it in to experience upon experience. This part of our identity is changing steadily and slowly as we run into new experiences. It is this identity that lives in the mind of a Child. It is this place that gives us hope and inspiration. Because in this part of our identity, it is limitless.

One of the things that this part of our identity does for us is it allows us to take stances or positions on beliefs and ideologies. Because it comes from what we perceive is real. It takes our idea of how the world is and allows us to determine a relationship to it. For example, the statement “I am honest” will generate the course of actions that will give the opportunities where we will prove to ourselves that “I am honest.” And if we go against this identity, we must rationalize it to ourselves how this identity is still true. If we fail to rationalize or explain how we are honest we then take that out of our identity. It becomes I am mostly honest or some other variation if we even include it in our identity thereafter.

It is the part of us that we become the most comfortable with. It becomes such a big part of who we are that we rarely notice it. For example, rarely would you tell yourself the identity “I am Honest” It has become such an integral part of who you are that you don’t even look for opportunities to be honest, you just react to situations in an honest manner. For example, you find a wallet, and instead of looking to see if there is money in it, you look for the owner. Your identity of being honest drives that thought. It is primary to find the owner and secondary to what is in the wallet and what happens if you can’t find the owner. The gut instinct says it is not yours and to return it. This gut reaction is the identity you have given yourself manifesting. Everyday these decisions are driven by the identity you have established prior to the event.

In the case when you encounter a new experience you will either draw on previous identities you have established, or you will generate a new layer of self-imposed identity through the experience. We all have encountered life changing events in our lives. Whether that is through physical pain, emotional pain, or a strong experience where we couldn’t fully comprehend the situation in that moment. It is in these moments where a person will change quickly. They are developing a new sense of identity based on the experience. And this change will be different for everyone. Even groups of people experiencing the same experience, as each person will interpret the events based on their own identities.

Socially-Imposed Identity

The antithesis to Self-Imposed Identity is Socially-Imposed Identity. Socially-Imposed Identity is placed on an individual from an external social order. It is given to a person instead of generated. It is based on the interaction with other beings in an experience. Instead of asking “Who am I?” it asks, “Who are you?” The difference is subtle, but the overall affect is drastic. It not only is a question of trying to find relationship to the world but also a way of defining placement in that experience. It is something to take a hold of and grip the understanding of the experience quickly. So, it is not only a “Who are you?” But a “Who are You to Me?” It is trying to find meaning in the co-occupants of the experience and the relationship that forms. The co-occupants are not necessarily people but can also be objects or even concrete ideas. This question can be limitless in possibilities, but the answers are not limitless in potential. The generator creates a value judgment on the co-occupants of the experience. The generator defines the relationship and the relevance to itself. In doing that it generates a value on the entities it encounters. Socially imposed identity pushes to define the co-occupant in simple and quick determinations in order to try and capture the complete picture of the experience. In doing that they lose the clarity of individual items. These interactions will then draw the conclusions for which will determine the identity. That identity is then placed on the co-occupants by the generator. As adults we tend to do this more than kids. This may be the reason that adults are not as easily fascinated by the simple and mundane things.

A child is fascinated with every little thing because they have not yet imposed an identity on the object. It is a new experience for them, as they try to understand this phenomena. But once understood it then can get categorized. This is often manifest in little kids when they mislabel things. Such as the famous vine video where a little girl says “Look at all those chickens” while motioning to a group of ducks. The little girl imposed an incorrect identity of a chicken onto the ducks. To her they were the same. She had not fully grasped that those identities were not the same. As an adult we have become so used to this socially imposed identity on it that we look right past it. For example, when we see a pencil, we just see the pencil. But if we were to really look at it in depth, we would see the complexities that lie in just making it. But we have imposed a generic idea over it and so we no longer observe the color, if it is hexagonal or round, mechanical or if it is solid graphite or imbedded in wood. To us they all have become the same thing. We do this to limit the information that we experience. To even try to ingest the vastness of complexities in a small room would overwhelm our senses. So, in pursuit of a larger and more complex view we simplify the experience with new identities.

When we socially impose an identity though there is another layer added as well. That layer is that it is not only a single person imposes this identity but that it is mirrored by multiple individuals. The issue is that we will even do this to humans. We will categorize and sort people into these superficial layers of information that we then read and then we project it on to people. This layering is socially imposing in action. This can be in wide ranges from Pop stars that become idolized to stereotyping people into demonization. To some groups we seek to obtain that status while others we reject because they fit the criteria of the order that we placed on them. The problem is that in doing that to people we lose the actuality of the people. We start to treat them a like we do the pencil. We label people as neighbors, classmates, etc. and then we stop seeing them as who they are but as a collection of people whose only defining characteristic is that they live close to you, or sit in a room for a particular subject. And there are times that it not only involves a group of people that we impose this identity on but as a group on to specific individuals. We look at people and try to make them be a certain way. A typical example is when we grow up as children. Our parents wanted us to think and behave a certain way. They told us to be honest, kind, respectful, etc. They took the good characteristics that they wanted us to have and tried to impose them on us. Now this process of growing up is much needed as this will set the stage for how we start to impose our own identity on ourselves.

This can also be expanded into the idea that we label people into groups. For example, in high schools there are Football Jocks and Nerds. Nerds have been categorized as being unattractive, wearing glasses, super intelligent, freckles, kind, buck teeth and braces. Football Jocks have been categorized as popular, attractive, dumb, mean, etc. And students have been notorious for labeling each other in various fashions. Often even to telling people directly that they are a Nerd, Jock, etc. The action of this labeling and confronting people with this presented identity is socially imposing that new identity on a person. And the individual has the ability to reject this label given but they also can claim it into their own identity. Regardless of the connotation of the label or if it is accepted, it is an identity that has been imposed on them. This act simplifies the bearer to the label.

How does Socially-Imposed Hurt Self-Imposed

People have been imposing different identities on people for as far back as history records. But in more recent history this has seemed to take root even further than ever. In the digital world socially-imposed identity transforms us even further rejecting people as people and turns them into a product of the number of likes that then gets sold to drive profits. In the political sphere we can see this break in the polarization of groups into ideologies that reject each other’s humanity and at times act out violently towards each other. In the family relationships we can see the imposed identity of family being extended to others who have no biological or legal relationship and being denied to those who do. Socially imposed identity as it places value on co-occupants of the experience devalues the parts of a self-imposed identity that are self-driven. It can take a self-imposed identity and strip it away completely. It has the capacity to take someone who has imposed honesty into their identity and turn it into a dishonesty by mir association to a socially imposed identity. For example, you can have an intelligent high school football player have the imposed social identity of a football jock on to them. With the socially imposed identity being placed on them it clouds and masks the true identity of the intelligence of the high schooler. If we look at Racism, an extreme case of Socially Imposed Identity, we can see how that might mask the true character of an individual being grouped with an inaccurate description of a person. It can be so blinding that people refuse and reject any concept of identity that differs from the socially imposed identity that the generator placed on the co-occupant. This level of socially imposed identity is dangerous as it hinders all truth to come forward. It is so deafening that it will mute all aspects of self-imposed identity. In this era of technological boom this is becoming even more apparent. We have progressed in many ways of advancements, but the value of a person is held just in place by the association of a socially imposed identity. We have become a slave to an invisible collective where we no longer dare to generate self-imposed identities. We fear that we cannot be ourselves without losing ourselves. We fear that if we become unique that we will somehow be rejected by the collective and that we will not have value to even ourselves. As we seek to find this perfection, we lose the only real part of ourselves and become mir copies of everything else. To those that do break free are praised by some and criticized by many.

Conclusion

Having been a person that doesn’t see the world like most, I have generated this crazy hat part to my identity. It is something that I truly enjoy. But I have met lots of people who say that they wish they could be like me but that they just can’t. While the world is chasing this idea of socially imposed identity we need to step back and say we “just can’t anymore.” We need to start looking at the details of life and people. We need to generate new ideas about who people are by really looking at them and not the surface details that we label them. We need to stop glancing with socially imposed identities and look at the self-imposed identities. We need to return to a mind of “I AM…” and asking “Who are You to You?